Book Review: White Fragility and So You Wanna Talk About Race
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Alright friends, as I mentioned in my The Least We Can Do post, there are a couple of bare minimum actions we white people should be taking as racism in America is at the forefront of the conversation. I recommended a bunch of books, all of which I purchased myself, all of which I will be reading. I’ll be reviewing each of them as I make my way through, sharing the most helpful bits. But please still take the time to push yourself and your own learning. This is just the beginning.
White Fragility by Robin DiAngelo
This book is probably best for someone who is just starting their learning when it comes to racism in America. Written by a white woman, this is aimed at those who still think white privilege isn’t a thing. Those who think racism was solved in 1965. Those who argue systemic racism is a myth. Those who get defensive when told something they said or did is racist. Which is a lot of people. What I think is effective about White Fragility is the way it breaks down some of the common myths and explains things in a way that white people can hopefully wrap their heads around. DiAngelo gives some basic differences between the terms prejudice, discrimination, and racism that I think are really important (and misunderstood by most people). My biggest takeaway was the need to get rid of the notion that if you say someone said or did something racist, you’re calling them a bad person. In our minds, racists equal members of the KKK. And yes, they are racist (duh). But so is every other white person raised in America. Our system has been designed this way, and it takes a lot of work to unpack that ingrained racism that has been pushed into your brain since birth. And it’s okay to say that you are working to become less racist. We have to get comfortable admitting we have a racism problem because if we can’t admit we have a problem, how can we ever solve it (rhetorical question because you can’t). I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I have said and done a lot of racist things in the past. Things I know have caused harm. I still have racist thoughts pop into my head. It sucks, and I need to do better. If you’re still coming to terms with this notion, White Fragility is probably a good place to start.
So You Wanna Talk About Race by Ijeoma Oluo
In general, I found this book more informative and more helpful, partly just because I found Oluo’s writing style easier to read. While this book also goes through some of the basics, it goes more in depth than White Fragility. What I liked about it were some of the specific examples the book gave about things like microaggressions (things I can almost 100% assure you you have said/done), checking your privilege, cultural appropriation, affirmative action, and the school to prison pipeline. These were all concepts I was familiar with on a surface level, but So You Wanna Talk About Race really lays it out there as to what each thing is, why it’s a problem, and ways you can start to fix it. I also found the chapter on intersectionality super informative. I felt like I walked away from that chapter with a firm grasp on a topic that seems to get twisted, especially as it relates to feminism. My biggest takeaway from So You Wanna Talk About Race was the actionable things I can do to push myself past just talking. I’m getting more comfortable talking about race, but the ultimate goal is to do the work to dismantle systemic racism, and that is obviously going to require more than just words. I found Oluo’s suggestions about actions to take to be really helpful. All of them were manageable and things I am going to work on incorporating into my action plan.
While I found both of these books to be full of good information, if you’re only going to read one, I would recommend So You Wanna Talk About Race, mostly because it pushed me and challenged me more than White Fragility, and I felt like I took away tangible ideas after reading.
If you have questions about either book, please feel free to reach out!
